I ventured further than I thought I'd ever go...
So my travels have now finally taken me to the outskirts of Coltishall, now whilst this place isn't strictly in my area of reviewing after having received several comments and messages I felt a trip was needed. Obviously with this being out of walking distance from the city, a car is needed, which does somewhat limit beer drinking abilities. A beer is essential with a burger as it acts as both a digestif, an aperitif and a palate cleanser post meal. Therefore, perfect accompaniment.
The Main Event
As per, ordered the Sergeant's burger at a reasonably hefty £13.95 (though everything on the menu is fairly pricey):
"Sergeant’s 8oz Steak Burger with Streaky Bacon & Cheese in a Toasted Bun, Home Cut Chips, Salad & Coleslaw"
I requested medium rare as usual to which the server didn't even bat an eyelid. 'No problem' she said. Lulling me into a sense of meaty security that this was set to be a good meal. The aromas from the dining room were mingling nicely and really getting the appetite to a ravenous climax. Combined with the rich malty beer I was supping the anticipation for this burger was rising like a high tide at Gorleston seafront.
The burger came and after a very quick snap I cut straight to it, let's get this bad boy open and check the all important burger slice. To my surprise, it was cooked well done, very much well done. I don't think there was any attempt at cooking medium rare. This was unexpected because there was absolutely no resistance when I asked. Usually I expect a little bit of banter from the waiting staff when I ask medium rare and they clearly have no intention of doing it. We go back and forth with a bit of tit for tat regarding 'if the chef is happy to' and 'they'll see what they can do' which ultimately leads to my disappointment and a dry burger. So the cooking disappointment aside what was the actual burger like? Well as stated, it was quite dry and unfortunately very heavily seasoned throughout. It was so heavily seasoned that I couldn't really appreciate the taste of the steak burger, a shame when places do use steak mince. I would be surprised if this was even indeed a homemade burger, the dryness could have been a result of freezing and the highly seasoned taste did somewhat remind me a little bit of those thick Captain Birdseye atrocities you find in Iceland. It wasn't necessarily a salt/pepper on top seasoning, it was throughout the entirety of the meat. It is that which leads me to suspect they are not homemade.
Moving on to the garnish. The onion came straight out, it was the tough plasticy outer husks of the onion which were piled on top of my burger, these were about as easy to digest as a piece of raw cartilage (if you happen to have ever tried that). The lettuce was decent chunks and fresh which did help to cut through the burgers taste. That alongside with a reasonable amount of pickle and a hefty amount of cheese (and good tasting rich cheese) really saved the burger somewhat.
The bacon was crisp though it's saltiness actually didn't help the ensemble given the state of the burger. The bun was sound, fluffy and warm and slightly toasted to lock in the runaway juices.
The Sides
Onion rings were solid. Fresh onion, great crisp batter, not claggy with a perfect crunch. Good effort on these and I didn't even realise the meal came with them so it was a nice little surprise on my plate.
The chips were homemade so I commend that. Personally for me they were a bit too thick so they seemed more like sad roast potatoes than crispy chips. I did sample some of their fries which were incredible so I would definitely swap out those girthy chips for a slender fry.
The coleslaw was ghastly. Utterly grim. I can't fully explain why as it didn't have that sour or fizzy taste that coleslaw usually gets when it goes off, it just had a very peculiar taste. I try not to complain too much in restaurants but this I had to as I was genuinely concerned. My tongue is adept to picking up all sorts of flavours, I could tell you all of KFC's eleven herbs and spices just from taste, in addition to which greasy kid spat in the batter mix. That said, the taste in the coleslaw stumped me. The second batch was the same as the first so potentially a batch gone wrong somehow? We will never know.
Overall
In general, the price of the dish warranted a better tasting patty, yes it may state steak mince, but the flavour just didn't back it up. Everything else in retrospect just aided to dull down the taste. This certainly wasn't the worst burger I've ever had but asking two crucial questions sums this up. Would I have this burger again? No. Would I recommend it to a friend? Most likely no.
3.5/10
The Recruiting Sergeant
Norwich Rd
Horstead
NR12 7EE
